Poem came this morning.

[tamaravining]

Stand Here

when I burnt down
to cinders
I knew how painful it was
but it wasn't until it was given back to me
in words
that I reveled in it
and got
lost and turned away and around
for a little while
for the wishing
and fascination
of it all

it may seem self-
absorbing and, I don't know,
whiney or irritatingly
complaining of me, but it
gave me time

wallowing
(coats pain with thick mud
blankets and banks the core and the soul)
for which you blame me
but I do not apologize
I live with being left alone;
no, more, choose that,
especially since you were one who yelled
"Jump, jump!"

instead I ran

there is no where left
for you
to stand
next to me

I burned it all away.